So I was hungry and bored and a little drunk and decided to make some homemade macaroni and cheese. I found this old leather-bound book that looked like a cookbook, so I opened it and followed a recipe. Turns out it was like the Necronomicon or something and I summoned a demon. He’s sitting on my couch right now being a dick, watching Netflix and drinking my beer. He won’t leave and says he’s going to take my soul unless I make him the world’s best mac and cheese. I have a box of crappy dollar store instant mac in the pantry. What can I do to make it better? I don’t have any crazy ingredients like fancy cheeses or truffles. Help.
Boil the noodles in holy water.
Not sure how to help but Elvira taught me Doritos will only make him stronger.
Fry one whole onion, plus a chunk of something meaty (I sometimes do ham, bacon, or ground beef) in butter in a separate pan while the noodles get boiled. Make the cheese sauce in that pan without draining anything out, so you have all the fat and brownings in there. After draining the macaroni, add directly to the pan, mix, then serve onto plate. Add black pepper and ketchup overtop.
All those other bachelors eating their plain macaroni will get their own demons, but you’ll be free!
(When I buy bacon, ham, or ground beef, I buy the largest packs and portion it into sandwich bags in the freezer with one serving per bag. That way I can toss them in things like this. And onions are cheap as shit.)
Guys, I think he’s dead. I think the demon took his soul cuz he hasn’t been online since the day he posted this.
Alive and well as @Gamera8ID@kaijus.us!
I have some ideas
You just need to add the essence of pure flavor. Simple water… and LSD.
