Then you try to charade what they look like, then your coworker starts going down a list of other coworkers names and you’re like “Honey, I don’t know anyone’s name, not even yours. Except of Charley from accounting, he as the same name as my nephew, he also kinda looks like him, but as a grown ass man. Then you wonder what would happen if they met, would they become friends? They don’t have much else in commun though… anyways, I don’t know who I spoke to, sorry.
Edit: I didn’t proof read my post until it was posted.
“Oh hey, remember (name)? They worked here like 6 months ago.”
No. No I do not remember that person. I probably didn’t learn their name when they were here, let alone retain that information 6 months later.
Now I just lie, cuz people do NOT like the implication that you’ll definitely forget their name in 6 months, too 😂 “Oh, yeah! That guy! How’s he doing these days?” While I desperately try to conjure a mental picture as they talk about That Guy. Usually the conversation ends with me still not having a clue.
I blame a lot on brain farts when the name I can’t come up with is someone who DOES still work here, “Fuck, why am I not coming up with this name that I 100% do, in fact, know??”
Really they should have been clued in to my horrible memory when I needed the phone number for our other store, that I call multiple times a DAY, to be written down near the phone because I can’t reliably remember it when I need it.
The phone number reminded me of a trick I found to get peoples names. Ask for their number them hand them your phone with a blank new contact to fill in. (Pro tip, screenshot the new contact or you won’t know who it was) Also “What’s your name again?” — “Joe” — “I know I meant your last name, how do you spell it?”. Somehow writing names down helps me. I can read them and remember them at a time when I’m not focusing 100% of my brain to not fuck up our conversation.
I worked at a theater for almost 2 years. Never learned the names of all the managers which was kinda amazing considering I was (unofficially) accountable to all of them (I was a projectionist, I was only technically accountable to my manager, but I had to fulfill any projection or technical needs the other managers had). I only knew the names of my manager, one of the women at the box office (she was really nice and the only one who regularly said hi when she saw me come in, and bye when she saw me leave), and then about 2 or 3 other managers.
Names are hard, except when they aren’t. I only remember names if it’s something my brain decides is important. Not if I think it’s important, if my brain thinks it’s important. My brain usually doesn’t think it’s important.
I work at an office suite, and a lot of people say hi to me with my name. I know none of their names. I’m also really terrible at recognizing faces (prosopagnosia). People probably think I’m extremely cold and aloof, but really I’m doing my best.
I’m terrible at remembering names! I can 100% tell you what they look like, hell, I can even tell you what they bought at the store I work at…but as far as their names? Nope. It’s awkward when someone I went to high school with two decades ago comes up and says… “Heyyyyy! (My name, of course they remember MY NAME) How’s the kids”…. 👀 I’m like… “heyyyy …. you! How’s it going???” 😬meanwhile I’m mentality trying to figure out why they kinda look familiar and how the heck they know I have kids… plural… lol. 😳
My bluff when that happens
“I spoke to… … … urgh mental blank! Tall, glasses, brown hair, drives a Volvo.”
“Mandy.”
“Ah! I kept thinking Megan but I knew that was wrong. Thank you”
Yep. The masking of pretending you have the name on the tip of your tongue when you know you never even retained it past 2 seconds after you were introduced.
Oh hell yeah. And it’s even worse when the coworker then finally figures out who you meant and goes “oh you meant [blank] why didn’t you say so?” and you’re so relieved that the uncomfortable situation has solved itself already that your brain checks it off as “completed” and moves on to the next task while still not getting the name that was just told to you five seconds ago… but then it is too embarrassing to ask again so you just roll with it and hope it doesn’t happen again (which it of course will).
Stop I’m already at maximum cringe.
