Now accepting donations of land, buildings, and other forms of real estate!

Can I please donate the real estate this occupies in my brain.

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This is my favorite book! I love that you love it too! It only gets better the further you get in the story. I own both the abridged and unabridged versions, can’t go wrong with either. Hope you enjoy the last half!

Yup, that’s the one!

I just want to say thank you, and I appreciate the team’s efforts to be excellent to each other.

Ah, the new American dream!

Oh absolutely, no one will sit through an actual movie that long. A series of some would be the way to go for sure.

Call me crazy, but I want a 14 hour epic of The Silmarillion…one movie, not a trilogy plz.

My response is even harsher…“Yeah, no, I’m finding a way to never use this company’s services ever again.” Easier said than done, but I don’t even want to associate with places that shove this in my face.

So, what is the difference between this approach and just selling an extended warranty?

World’s happiest hand, just discovered!

Shrimp.

A friend pointed out to me that shrimp are basically the cockroaches of the sea. They just float around and eat fish poop all day. So gross and I can’t even.

Have you tried your local Swords 'R Us? I hear there’s a July 4 blowout sale this week. Use promo code Pond50 for half of your pond!

That’s the spirit!

The nice thing about being a pessimist is that you are always either right, or pleasantly surprised.

I was trying to think how this could be enforced. It actually makes sense when you frame it this way, didn’t think about the parent side. “Sorry Karen, that’s the law! Your kid week get her phone back in a week!”

October 2025 me: what the hell, why didn’t anyone tell me about this before!?!

Someone recently told me they bought a “vintage truck”. I asked them what year the truck was made, expecting something from the 60’s or so…but apparently 1985 is vintage now. 😟

That’s a solid platform,! Where do I send campaign donations?