And water cars have been a thing since at least LBJ was president.

Disney uses them as a side attraction in their shopping mall.

Progressively upgrading my camping kit so that I can have a full cast iron camp cooking setup and enjoy coffee, eggs and bacon in the mountains.

Puts on heavy atmospheric goth rock

“Wait no, not like that”

Use scissors! Get into the habit of always cutting the tape. It may take extra time at first, but in the long run will save you lots and lots of time and headache!

Source: used it when I worked as a cook and now use it at home.

*Unless you’re in the south.

Everyone and their Dad is in trades of one kind or another, and they hire their kids.

I tried that in a group of people the other day. I got a resounding “Nah, I’m good”

What do you do when everyone is happy to die? Because right now my plan is “try my damned best to make sure these dipshits don’t take me down with them”

Nobody needs to buy it, the minions just need something to shout at you when you try to correct them.

Good news is probably yes?

Bad news is life definitely gets worse before then.

If you ask them, they need all that money to bring their future vision to life, they can’t waste any of it on “petty wasteful spending” like on other people or something.

The thing is, I think some of them genuinely think the world will be better if they control it, but they’re too stupid to make their vision work so it will of course fall apart and they’ll die in their bunkers that they never thought they’d actually need to use because it was “just in case”

Aside from the affordability thing…

Do rich people think we make each others beds? Tuck each other in for the night?

Because america has investors, and they’re fashioning themselves golden parachutes with our corpses.

(Sung to the tune of “That’s Amore!”)

Put your hand in that crack and you won’t get it back,

That’s a moray!

Because you hit the magic doom number and then the world doesn’t come to an end.

Hello, potato.