• afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world
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    6 months ago

    Not sure, you should gather more data. Next time you are with someone keep mentioning a different person. Share your results.

    • MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca
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      6 months ago

      My results would be invalid because I don’t participate in open relationships.

      I don’t have anything against such an arrangement, but I know myself, and knowing that my partner may be out, sleeping with another person would make me a very jealous person; normally, in a closed relationship, unless there is some kind of evidence of infidelity, I’m not jealous at all. I don’t look for such evidence, and I do everything in my power to trust what my partner tells me as truth. My most significant rule in a relationship is that I will not lie to them about anything that matters, nor will I tolerate being lied to about the same. I’m up front about this arrangement with anyone I get involved with.

      I have been in relationships where I’ve been lied to, and I have been in situations where there has been infidelity in the relationship (or at least, evidence it did or will happen). I did not like the person I became. So I tend to avoid situations where I could become that person.

      I have not, nor would I allow myself to be in an open relationship. As such, I do not possess the mental fortitude to deal with my partner having intimate relationships with others. It’s a character flaw that I don’t seem to be able to get over, so I avoid it. Since I am not in an open relationship, it would not be a valid comparison, since there’s factors in the OP that I cannot satisfy, and the results would not reflect a comparible situation.

      All I can say is that I would imagine that in an open relationship, such things would be reacted to differently than in a closed relationship. Since I do not have the requisite experience necessary to know those differences, instead, I asked.

      Instead of a genuine response I get sarcastic and snide replies about “how would you feel?”, when I have no basis for comparison.

      Thanks though.