I don’t do it often, but pasta with a cream of mushroom or clam chowder soup.

Maybe not too weird, but that’s probably as weird as it gets.

I make a meaty spaghetti sauce with various spices, but I cook the ground beef in the pan at a low simmer for about 2hrs before I even add the tomato sauce, in order for those spices to penetrate the meat.

I call it a nuclear time bomb because it tastes totally normal - very delicious, even - but about 10-15 minutes in, you are reaching for a hand towel to wipe away the sweat which is quite literally dripping off of you. And you have felt NONE of the hot spices on your tongue.

A much quicker dish involves Cæsar dressing, which I add copious amounts of garlic powder to (4-5 tablespoons), then prevent the dressing from solidifying by adding lemon juice, then wrapping up with freshly ground garlic. As in, a paste, *not chopped or minced._ For a salad using a single head of Romaine, the paste alone uses 15-30 garlic cloves depending on size. And this is on top of the garlic powder. Tastes amazing, but it can get garlicky enough to be barely edible. Think the same kind of burn when chewing down on a fresh raw clove. I sometimes get an “addictive overwhelming thirst” for this garlicky dish that has me gorging on it almost exclusively for an entire week.

…so i grew up with what we called five-way in northern kentucky, and no, it’s not cincinnati chili…

• spaghetti
• browned ground beef (or in my case since 1989, vegetarian substitute)
• diced onions (fresh / cold)
• dark red kidney beans (simmered / hot)
• grated cheddar cheese (annatto-colored)
• ketchup

…it’s all layered up on a large plate in that order, bottom-to-top so the cheese melts nicely, cut into a grid pattern with a fork and knife, and then mixed together: i don’t cook it often since moving out on my own thirty-five years ago but it so hits the spot when i do…

Not super common but commen enough and just for a snack, but I like using tortillas if there’s no bread in my apartment. I use them for things like peanut butter and mayonnaise wraps and peanut butter and butter wraps.

I also sometimes use tortillas for leftovers in general, depending on the leftovers from the night before. Last time there was leftover homemade mac and cheese and catfish, I heated them and had that wrapped in a plain tortilla with nothing else for breakfast.

Sandines and kraut with mustard and caraway. I only eat it when I’m alone and have time to brush my teeth afterward. So good though and I’m full for hours.

I made Mac and cheese with Velveeta and ground turkey.

My so called broccoli-potato-gratin with pork neck includes quite an amount of cream, salt, bouillion cubes and cheese. My wife doesn’t know and it will stay that way.

Cut up tortillas, fry them with some salt, when crispy crack two or three eggs in there and scramble. I grew up eating it and while it is delicious I don’t think I would serve it to guests.

When I was pretty serious about powerlifting, I would wake up in the middle of the night and eat a giant spoonful of peanut butter with a big glass of milk, and then go back to bed. I certainly wouldn’t offer that to a guest.

Variant on your dish: bake sweet potato, add cottage cheese and eat immediately. Add sweet or savory seasonings to taste. It’s not something I’d bring to share, but it’s definitely not something I’ll hide. As far as quick and dirty meals, it’s reasonably healthy, and probably not the worst suggestion for someone who struggles to cook for themselves.

Actual goblin food: canned black olives between two slices of bread, smush down to prevent them from rolling out.

Guacamole with cottage cheese. The Polish side of my family loves it, but I wouldn’t dare add it to my guac when making it for the Mexican half of my family.

I put ketchup on bread and microwave it

Butter beans with olives. Cover it in oregano, some garlic, some chilli flakes, and then drizzle some soy sauce and olive oil over the top.

It’s dumb, but it’s so tasty, quick, and easy.

I’m not going to put a bowl of lentils and hot sauce in front of a guest.

I don’t think there’s anything that I eat that couldn’t be served to anyone else. Even some particularly Brazilian dishes, such as cooked cassava or corn couscous with milk and butter are pretty much vanilla compared to some other local dishes which I dread - such as buchada (a brazilian haggis, made with rice and goat offals), sarapatel (just the cooked goat offals) or chouriço doce (a reduction of sugar, spices and pig blood).